January 8, 2012

The Countdown is ON!

Yep, here we go. Less than a month till the big surgery day. My freezer is getting filled with things I am blending and freezing for the coming days where I eat through a syringe. I have turkey dinner (from Christmas) and turkey soup too (blended smooth). I even included a couple meals of finely diced turkey dinner (turkey, potatoes, sweet potatoes, carrots, peas) for when I am able to start on small/soft meals again.

I been able to say so far, that I hadn't been nervous. Can't say that anymore. 2 nights ago, I had a panic attack. Actually, at first I thought I was having a heart attack, then I took a second and thought about what I was feeling and it became clear that the horror-show type images that were in my mind (about the upcoming surgery, bone saws, titanium plates, etc) and decided to just go to sleep and hopefully wake up refreshed.

Thank goodness, I did wake up feeling less traumatized, however really run down. I have come down with some kind of sickness... throat is swollen, my head is hurtin' and I just feel blah. Well, as long as I get all this out of my system before the big day I'll be fine.

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